By Sara Russell, Ph.D., FNTP
Mother’s Day is right around the corner—a special day when we recognize the gifts and sacrifices of motherhood. For those of you who are preparing to become mothers for the first time, or preparing for a repeat pregnancy, one of the most important reminders is the value of self-care. Self-care is a vital element in the lives of mothers and mothers-to-be. This post breaks down self-care into a few different areas that apply to most of our lives. Your individual situation may be different, but you can use this as a starting point for your reflections on your own needs.
Replenishing sleep
In a culture that prizes productivity, we sometimes forget the vital role of sleep. Yet sleep is one of the great rejuvenators and one of the most important hormone-balancers, especially as you prepare your body for motherhood. Proper sleep keeps the body young by allowing for the repair of tissues and for proper detoxification of waste products. It keeps our bodies fertile by promoting a healthy balance of sex hormones and stress hormones and good adrenal and thyroid function. If you have important projects, make sure that you organize your time so that your sleep schedule is protected. Protect your sleeping space so that it is conducive to rest as well as intimacy with your spouse or partner—don’t eat or work in the same room where you sleep!
Avoid watching TV or using electronic devices in your bedroom or within a couple of hours of going to bed, as the lights, frequencies, and emotional stimulation these generate can adversely impact your ability to rest.
Most of us need between 7.5 and 9 hours of sleep per night in order to wake up rested. Some of us tend to be early risers; others tend to be night owls. Keep in mind that sleep during the pre-midnight hours is more restorative to the female endocrine system, so do your best to get to bed at a decent hour. Your sleep will be more replenishing if you have a routine that allows you to go to bed at around the same time, most if not all nights, so your body can program itself to prepare for rest at the right time.
Cultivating relaxation on your path to motherhood
What helps you relax and feel a sense of lightness and joy?
Everyone’s list is different, but here is a compilation that covers a lot of common favorites. Note that for some people, relaxation is about silence and stillness, and for some, it’s more dynamic. For many of us, it’s a combination.
Fresh air, sunshine, hikes, beautiful places, lunch or tea with a best friend or loved one, gardening, listening to beautiful music, walking the dog, knitting, sewing, scrapbooking, singing, dancing, sitting meditation, mindfulness, yoga, reading, etc.
Build vacations into your natural rhythms. Whether you travel or not, take time out. A whole week off work at least once a year, depending on your job and the flexibility it offers. Time for yourself and your cherished relationships every weekend, and a little oasis of peace for yourself and space for relaxing with your partner every day.
Reducing stress
We all have different tolerances for stress and different sources of stress in our lives. Stress can come from many different sources. These include disappointments, arguments, tensions on the job, illness, pain, fear, poor sleep, toxic exposures and change. Any type of change can cause stress, even those that are positive. But don’t get me wrong—I definitely don’t advocate living in a bubble (that sure would be stressful for me)! The point is to avoid avoidable stressors while building up your resilience so you can handle the unavoidable ones.
As you prepare for motherhood, one of the most important skills you can learn is cutting down on stress and building up your resilience.
Improving resilience through nutrition and lifestyle
Besides the tips above, you can actively increase your body’s level of resilience by eating nourishing foods. Every cell, tissue, organ, system and function in the body needs high-quality nutrition in order to survive. This is supplied by nutrient-dense foods in the context of a lifestyle that allows you to digest and assimilate nutrients properly. Avoid eating while standing, walking, driving, arguing, rushing, or feeling emotionally distraught. At home, have a space for eating. If you don’t own a table, get one. It doesn’t have to be fancy or expensive. If you have a table, but it’s full of junk, put away your junk and use your table for eating. Your life will change for the better!
In some cultures and families, there are little rituals that are used to prepare the mind and body for eating, and these really help us digest and absorb our nutrients better. For example, Italians spread a tablecloth over the table at the start of the meal. A lot of families around the world say grace or express gratitude to each other or just say a few nice things about their day.
Find your own rituals, and see what you can integrate from the tips below, which are designed for any eating space, be it home, work or some other location.
Mindful eating tips:
- Take a moment to clear your mind and relax if you can—even just a few clearing breaths
- Set up your eating space. Turn off the computer, silence the cell phone, and set your work to the side if you are in a place where you work. Set up your space with the food, water and any condiments needed for your meal so you’re not getting up and down during your meal.
- Sit down to eat, eat slowly, and chew your food well.
- Take a moment at the end of your meal for another few minutes of relaxation, and try not to rush off into action the moment your meal is over.